Sunday Story- Temerarious

Temerarious- reckless; rash

Ex: They barred Reggie from the bumper cars attraction for his temerarious driving. He would gather intel on all the other drivers prior to the beginning of the session, and would make mental note of the weakest links in the group. In the bag by his feet was an enormous magnet that he used to propel his car forward at a speed greater than that of all the other cars. When the starting horn blared and the bumper cars began to move, he slammed down on the gas pedal with a lead foot and made a b-line towards the mother-toddler duo in the red car. He crashed into the car with a massive THUD which snapped his own head back and sent the toddler flying out of his mother’s lap and onto the floor. The ride operator saw this and immediately locked up all the other cars. He spiked his caramel apple into the trashcan and barreled towards Reggie. He was looking PISSED.

Reggie unbuckled his seatbelt, grabbed his bag and got out of his car to run for the exit. The operator yelled, “STOP! GET BACK HERE!” but Reggie kept on running. The magnet on his back had other plans, however. As he ran past a car, the powerful magnet sucked him up against the metal rod connecting the bumper car to the roof of the bumper arena. He was stuck. The operator pulled out his walkie talkie and spoke into it,

“We got a magnet guy in the bumper chamber. Send over Harold from the high-striker station. We’re going to need some muscle. Over.”

He walked over to Reggie and grabbed his ear like a disapproving grandmother. “Listen up, punk. Nobody messes with the flow of my cars, you hear me? You abide by the bumper laws, or you face the bumper operator claws, rawwrr”

*He shows his teeth and makes a cat scratching motion with his available hand*

Reggie just stared back at him blankly.

A powerful looking brute of a man entered the bumper chamber.

“Ah, Harold, just the man I was looking for. Get this pest, this little mouse *he hisses* off of this pole and out of my dojo.”

Harold grabbed Reggie’s waist and yanked him off the pole with ease.

“What do you want me to do with him?” He asked the operator.

“S, s, s, send him to the *meow* rope ladder climbing game. Everyone knows it is impossible *hiss* to make it to the top!”

“Uhh, okay? You don’t want me to throw him out of the grounds? Or to call the police or anything like that?”

“No, Harold. That won’t be necessary. Let’s show this little twerp the ropes. Have fun with those low to middle tier prizes, bucko!”

Reggie, who had been silent up until this point, felt he had to chime in.

“If it’s alright with you, I’d rather have you just call the police. I can’t be bothered wasting my time on that thing.”

The operator looked at him with disgust.

“No, you will do the rope ladder. And this time you won’t be able to CHEAT! There won’t be any CHEATING this time around!”

The operator began to get red in the face. His neck and forehead veins were bulging out further and further with every utterance.

“CHEATER! CHEATER! CHEATER! NO CHEATERS! NO CHEATING! NEVER! NOT IN MY GAME! NOT ANYWHERE! NO CHEATING! CHEATING! CHEATER! CHEATING! CHEATER! CHEATING!”

He melted to the ground and put his head in his hands. The other bumper car drivers made awkward eye contact with one another as they unclipped their seat belts and headed for the exit. Harold put his hand on the operator’s shoulder and whispered in his ear, “Hey man, what do you say we get you some kettle corn and hit the reptile tent. Does that sound cool?”

The operator lifted his head, revealing his bloodshot eyes and smeared cat eye mascara running down his cheeks. “Okay, Harold. That sounds nice. Lead me there.”

Harold scooped up the operator and hoisted him onto his shoulders. They exited the arena and headed into the symphony of skyburst reds and yellows fusing together to form a brilliant sunset just above the carnival grounds. Reggie just sat there on the bumper chamber floor and thought about his life, his life choices, and if he was at all fulfilled. He came to the conclusion that no, he needed to make some drastic changes. So he left the chamber, walked up to the military recruiter at the stand next to the tank, and enlisted in the United States Marine Corps. Reggie was killed in action in Afghanistan in October 2010 when an IED blew up the MATV he was riding in. Two other soldiers who were riding with him were injured in the blast. In an interview following the incident, they claimed that a “mysterious pulling force” had attracted them to the bomb.