Snollygoster

Snollygoster- an unscrupulous, unprincipled person

Ex: You may find the pot-smoking burnout carney managing the line in front of the Anus-Exploder MegaCoaster to be a snollygoster, but I, as a dwarf, do not view him as such. For he looked the other way when I propped my little nugget of a body up underneath the cartoon roll of toilet paper marking the height requirements for the ride, and for that I am forever grateful. I had never felt the thrill of a megacoaster. The tangible feeling of shared suspense as our car climbed up slowly towards the peak, and the euphoric release, of both emotion and bodily fluids, as we plummeted back down to earth. The heavy atmospheric pressure that felt like a paralysis demon pressing down on my chest. The desire to look all nonchalant and cool as I approached the camera that took a grainy snapshot of us rolling back into the dock that could be purchased for a mere 30 dollars. The anger in the photo booth operator’s voice as he picked me out in the coaster photo, grabbed his walkie talkie, and said something to the tune of, “We got a code tic-tac. The guy working the line let some midget onto the coaster. Yes, yes he does look super fucking cool in the picture, almost like he wasn’t even phased by the high speeds and the nausea-inducing Colon Cleanser Corkscrew section”. The guilt as I watched a security guard lead the pot-smelling burnout carney out in handcuffs. Never had I felt smaller than in that very moment. The oversized stuffed banana in my hands (a prize I had won on the ring toss game) wasn’t doing me any favors. I was not just a midget, but a mental midget.