Scotch (The Eminem "Stan" remix)

Scotch- to put an end to

Ex: Aaron Rodger’s tragic slip and subsequent Achilles tear quickly scotched any Jets fans’ hopes for a Super Bowl run this year. *Thank You by Dido starts playing*

My tea’s gone cold I’m wondering why

I got out of bed at all

The morning raid clouds up my window

And I can’t see at all

And even if I could it’d all be gray

But your picture on my wall

It reminds me that it’s not so bad

It’s not so bad

Dear Aaron, I drafted you, but you still not playing

We gave you your supporting cast from Green Bay, and even paid ‘em,

We sent some picks to your old squad, promised them first rounders

Up until you slipped, on that wet night, it left me floundered

There probably was a problem with the turf at MetLife or something,

But anyways, fuck it, what’s up man, how’s ayahuasca?

My girls a Jets fan too, she’s pregnant, I’m about to be a father

If my son’s a Jets fan guess what I’ma call him?

I’ma name him Aaron

I read about your Achilles too, I’m sorry

I had a Jets fan friend kill himself over the possibility of Zach Wilson starting

I know you probably hear this every day but I’m your biggest fan

I even sought out the shaman you did ayahuasca with in Japan

I got a room full of your posters and pictures, man

I like the shit you did on Hard Knocks too, that shit was phat

Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back

Just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan, this is Fireman Stan

My tea’s gone cold I’m wondering why

I got out of bed at all

The morning raid clouds up my window

And I can’t see at all

And even if I could it’d all be gray

But your picture on my wall

It reminds me that it’s not so bad

It’s not so bad