Obsolescent, Petulant

Obsolescent- going out of use; losing utility

Ex: The whole concept of the outdoors is becoming obsolescent these days. When you think about it, it’s not that hard to understand why. Just think: Chipotle- indoors; the overwhelming majority of Xbox and PlayStation setups- indoors; access to all screens - indoors. Now compare that to: parasitic ticks that transmit Lyme Disease- outdoors; the sun- famous for causing skin cancer- outdoors; lightning- noted for its ability to devastatingly strike standalone targets- outdoors; water- have you seen Jaws?- outdoors.

Petulant- ill-tempered; fussy

Ex: The man behaved like a petulant child when he discovered that his Sports Illustrated: Swimsuit Edition had been delivered to the wrong address. *On his hands and knees banging the kitchen floor repeatedly with his fist* “No, no, no!!! This is an outrage!!! They will pay for this!!! The first year they introduce plus sized models, and this is what God has decided to happen? Why, lord, whyyyyyyy?!!!?!!!!?!!!” *His wife Trish, a very slight 90-pound woman, peaking her head around the corner of the kitchen’s entrance* “I knew it!!! I knew it all along! No wonder you could never shop for groceries like a normal person. It always had to be cookies and cakes and ice cream, specifically in the flavors that you thought I’d love! Well sorry that I have an overactive thyroid! You think I want to be like this! Each day I wake up and I dream of looking like Lizzo, but sadly, and apparently very sadly for you, that day will never come!”