Lassitude, Lurid

Lassitude- physical or mental weariness; lack of energy

Ex: Long Covid had left her in a perpetual state of lassitude. She had to forego the girls trip to Nashville because she just didn’t have the energy to put on a cowboy hat, drink a couple High Noons, say, “SLAYY!”, and post that same beaten-to-death picture of the neon signs on Broadway that we could all probably retrace from memory at this point. All she could summon the energy to do at this point was bake some pandemic banana bread. She had baked a unique loaf every day for the last seven months. But she’d be lying if she said even that activity wasn’t losing its luster. You could tell by her diminished enthusiasm in her daily TikTok posts documenting the baking process. In yesterday’s clip you could hear her audibly gag as she pulled a savory bread made with plantain chips, carob-based bitter vegan chocolate, and star anise from the oven. She managed to barely squeak out an, “excited to try today’s loaf” as she nibbled a corner of the bread and winced in pain.

Lurid- sensational or dramatic

Ex: Lurid details of the fraternity hazing process were posted anonymously on a school blog. Some of the acts they made the pledges do sounded like Bizarro X-Games events: “Downhill Drunken Barrel Racing”, “Upside Down Keg Stand Skateboarding”, “Oreo Ass-Clench Stair Climbing”, “Extreme Hot Coal Elephant Walk”. After catching wind of this, the head of Greek Life at the school had no choice but to…join in on the fun! When he walked into the boardroom to discuss the proposed sanctions against the fraternity, the other board members were surprised to see that he ditched his usual shirt, tie, and slacks, for an “Osama Zyn Laden” t-shirt and a “Saturdays are for the Boys” trucker hat.

“Sir, are you feeling alright? Why are you dressed like that?” Asked the VP of student affairs.

“I’m a little hung from all the Dubra pulls, not gonna lie. But I ripped a couple dark blue American Spirits right before this so I wouldn’t be jonesing for another til after the meeting. I’m thinking of getting a quick pump in and then hitting Chipotle after this if anyone else is down. Gotta fuel up before the night cap!”