Largess, Bereft

Largess- generosity in giving gifts to others

Ex: The largess with which he handed out bread to the street urchins of Baltimore was quite misleading. No, he wasn’t just doing it out of the kindness of his heart. He had just assaulted a French baker at a local patisserie and stole all of his freshly baked baguettes, and he was looking for a place to unload his contraband. A switch had gone off in his mind when he laid eyes on the brick smoke stacks rising out of the factory behind the bakery that were eerily reminiscent of those found in downtown Pittsburgh, otherwise known as the “Steel City”, causing him to see red. He had taken it upon himself to greet this potential Steelers fan the only way they knew how in Baltimore: by getting unreasonably verbally and physically abusive in defense of their grey, dreary metropolis by the bay. WELCOME TO RAVENS COUNTRY, LAMAR JACKSON IS OUR JESUS!

Bereft- deprived or robbed of something

Ex: Local man was left bereft of his masculinity- and his ankles- after an inner-city teen walking down the sidewalk dribbling a basketball crossed him up badly in front of his girlfriend. To all readers: If you see a kid with a basketball approaching you on the sidewalk in the downtown of any major city, you turn around and get the fuck out of there immediately. Nothing good can come of that interaction. You’re either going to, A) appear athletically feeble, B) get called some version of pops/old-timer/fogey/granddad, or C) a combination of the two.