Hortatory

Hortatory- urging to some cause of action with strong appeals

Ex: Normally I don’t so much as glance over at the billboards flanking the interstate as I speed on by, but this particular one was different. The hortatory messaging in a nauseating Pepto-Bismol pink font sitting underneath a picture of a funny looking celery stick read, “TAKE A STAND AGAINST ANTS ON A LOG”. You know what? I will take a stand against ants on a log. I could care less about your urgent appeals for donations to a new cancer ward or to fix cleft palates in rural villages in Africa, but ants on a log, that’s where I draw the line! Celery. Peanut butter. Raisins. Why? What monster put those three together? That’s no different than me coming up to you with a carrot lathered in Nutella and then rolled in poppy seeds and asking if you want to try a bite of my, “fleas on a shit-dipped pole”